It's time for him to go.

"Assalamualaikum,

It take awhile for me to type this into my blog and today i decided to finish it once for all. - August 4th, 15 12:00 AM 

Sihat died.

Which my cat which i have featured in my previous entry. He died in the cause of some virus and pneumonia." (I stop typing at this moment as i couldn't handle the pain)

Assalamualaikum,

Hey Hi Hello guys!

How are you guys doing?

Well Yes. i stop typing right away when i'm about to express what i feel when my dear cat died last 2 month. 28th of July. My birthday month. Gosh. it takes a while for me to keep myself together and continue to type this entry. I remember when i first got him. It's the last episode and live for Suka lattew, me as the production exec. One of the production team came back from vet clinic bringing this little cutie pie. Unfortunate for him, one of the production team accidently langgar his leg and cause him paralysed on his left leg. But i can see, Sihat were a really strong kitten at that moment. I fell in love with him right away and offers the team to take care of him since nobody can. 

HAHA looking back on that day.  Dec 2014, he cause lot of trouble to all my production team. why ? with his condition, we thought he will not capable to jump put from the basket, since we have no cage. Unfortunate, he went missing right after the live. we found out that he went under the stairs with many things stored (heavy things) under it as well. At first i have give up when he totally ignored my calls, then i went back to the production room. My boss asked me did i manage to get the cat, with a sad face i said "no". My boss then call each of the production team (guy) to help him moved all the stuff under the stairs just to get this little trouble maker. It was so funny. Mr Bedullah, my boyfriend helps to when he also about to give up when Sihat ignore his calls. 

Why Sihat? 

My mom. she was pity with his condition. Sihat couldn't control himself. he peed in his sleep, he feels uncomfortable with himself. giving and calling him Sihat is a pray that he will get better soon. Sihat means Healthy. i know and i can see it's hard for him at first to control himself walking with only 3 legs. i did thought to cut out the left leg but. how can he walk with just 3 leg? i talk to the doctor that i want to give him a chance to make use with his paralysed leg first. He always with me when i come back home, he always bite my hand which i assume, it's his way of telling that he missed me a lot. My mom can see that he loves me so much when He came home only if i called.

27th July 2015, i called him, he didn't came back. This one day that he had never answer my calls. i was worried sick. Yes, he grown up now. so i assume he was playing around and sleeping. Even with his condition, that God that he manage to run like normal cat, just bit weird with is left leg. but still. He was so active. Unfortunate, He had his fever that day but my mom couldn't said "no Sihat , stay home!" he's a cat, how can he understand? 

7 pm at night. i was still looking for him. calling him over and over again. i can't wait then, I went out with my neighbours that night. Hanging out at cafes, i was enjoying my food, laughing and having a great time which i did not notice that i will cry my eyes out later that night. 

I came back home around 10pm -11pm and saw sihat laying in front of the gate looking at me while his trying to catch his breath. i can see he had dificulties to breath. i called my dad and ask where can i send him to at this hour. my dad picks me up and we've send him to vet hospital (i forgot the place - trying to handle my tears right now). Sihat calling me, i know he's telling me that his in pain. i couldn't stop crying. I beg to God please take a way his pain and give it to me if can. he already went thru soo much when he's young this is not fair to him. i didn't know what happen. 

Arrived at the hospital, the doctor check him right away and telling me that he has problem with his lung. i ask the doctor to do anything. then what disappoint me so much that it cost RM2K for his treatment but no guarantee that he will survive looking at his condition, he might die during the treatment. I was in pain, sad and broken. Sihat keep calling me, seems like he asking me when he can feel better. he was so much in pain. i couldn't said anything but telling him that everything gonna be okay, soon. I pray that God to take his life a way rather that seeing him in pain. 

I take him back home. sit with him and looking at his eyes, one last word i said. "You will go to somewhere better sihat i promise you. please remember me" my mom advice for me to come in, it's already late, i have to left him alone in the cage. 

I call Amin, i can't stop crying. 

later that morning. my mom called me, she said sihat was gone. It's time for him to go. 

So guys, This is what happened. i know. maybe for some. this is nothing. he just a cat. I have been living my life with more that 50 cats and yet Sihat has given me so much memory. Why did i cry to much? Since i have been living with more than 50 cats, so then i must be used to it right ? no. i cried everytime my cat died. each of them. But what make me disappointed so much with sihat is, for the past 24 years i supposed that i know how to take care of my cat but then, i still couldn't save him. 

The only thing i hope, if one day, i could get a chance to meet all of my cats. I just want to say sorry if i'm not great in taking care of you guys. Please do not forget me. 

In Memory Sihat 2014 - 2015, Al-Fatihah.
I miss you love.

Till then.